This poor silly child writes a column in which she moans about the fact that, despite a degree from Yale, she can't get a job worthy of her intellectual acumen.

Will someone please tell me where I went wrong? she pleads, and boy, have people been lining up to tell her. Shawna Gale of Atlanta, now known netwide as the "Wailin' Yalie," claims to possess "impressive analytical skills" and "well-developed public relations skills" -- neither of which are on display. Verily, verily, I say unto you, a high degree of self-importance invariably means a low degree of self-knowledge. She's a child of the welfare state who believes a degree entitles her to a job.

"I have many valuable skills" -- that word again! -- "honed during my days with Dickens, my nights with Nabokov, those wee hours with Woolf." I've logged most of the past summer with Dickens and years with Nabokov, and chances are excellent I'll never see the kind of money Shawna thinks she deserves and I'm twice her age.

I hate to sound like an old grump, but kids today need to learn to get off their ass.